Your Kid has Graduated High School! Now What? Part VII: Find that One Professor that is Eager to Help
College can be a scary thing. It can also be a happy thing. College in and of itself is like a roller coaster. You've met the criteria to get on the ride, but are seemingly unaware that there are ups, downs, cork-screws, flips, twists, and dives during your enrollment that can make you laugh, cry, scream, and let's be honest, heave your $4.00 lunch! But, there is something to be said about finding an instructor or professor who is not there for the money, the title, or the notoriety of having "grading power"... Yes, there are some who are truly there to increase YOUR wealth of knowledge. Those who will go to bat for you when you have suffered an injustice, and those who will listen to your rant when you need some moral support.
But how do you find them?
As a college student, you are constantly surrounded by others who are academically inclined. Whether you share the same major is of little importance. The instructor or professor of many 1000 and 2000 level courses are inundated with students. They are a name and a grade on a sheet of paper.
But is it important to the student to be known by the instructor?
Well, well, well… Your baby has up and graduated high school and perhaps they are looking at careers and trying to decide if college is the right choice, or if a trade school is more to their liking. Either are great ways to jumpstart their independence as they run, walk, gallop, and for a few; trip headfirst into the real world. But let’s face it. College seems to be where all the attention is now days.
It's nearly bedtime and something continues to weigh on my mind. No, it's not the million and one things I need to do before our homeschool class starts on Monday. And it's certainly not the thesis I need to be working on. It's not even the mountain of household chores that I rediculously put off today in order to Netflix and nap.
It's the bothersome idea that I'm not good enough. Not good enough for my children. Not good enough as a teacher. Not good enough as a homeschool parent. You see, all day long I've been thinking about a post I saw on a facebook group. The comment was something along the lines of "...surrounded by doubt and negativity from outsiders on the choice to homeschool". I immediately thought of a woman just holding her head in her hands, feeling as though the world was out to get her.
While I've only had to argue with myself when thoughts like these pop into my head, I was caught off guard by the comment and after reading her tearful pleas for support, I started thinking of how I would approach the issue.
Then it occurred to me.
You know that feeling? The one that hits before you really had time to process it and before you know it, you're in a funk of astronomical proportions. The one where you'd just as soon drop everything and go back to life before homeschooling. The one where you had a small amount of "me time" that happened after the kids got on the school bus. Or perhaps when they went to daycare so you could go to work. I mean, at least at work, you didn't have an infant attached at the breast, gnawing away at the very fibers of your being. That small little light, where If you played your cards right, you might get a hot lunch out of the deal, too. You could go to the bathroom and didn't worry about a tiny hand reaching under the door scaring the bejeezes out of you -- and if you did -- you'd report to HR as soon as you washed your hands, to tell on them!
Regardless of how you got here -- here you are, in all your "hot-mess homeschool glory", trying to keep a smile on your face when you really have a hard time just walking through what used to be your living room, but you've now dubbed "ground zero". Your hair hasn't seen a hot roller or hair dryer in a week and you are almost positive that if given the chance, you could sleep standing up and not fall over. And let's not forget the husband, you know, the man you fell in love with and promised to cherish - he's missing you and telling you all about it. He might even be putting negative thoughts into your mind such as "enroll them in public school" *GASP*!
I've been there. In fact, I just went through it. It started in late March. I brushed it off as end-of-the-year burn-out, knowing that I would push through and feel better when the school year ended. But then a rather dismal blanket of depression settled over me. I was no longer the semi-chipper person I used to be. I didn't worry if the house was tidy. I fought back tears every time I had to leave the house. I was suffering from some heavy emotions and I was certainly not prepared to deal with them. I talked to God, my husband, my friend, I'd journal or blog... Nothing. Nothing seemed to help. The closer it got to summer, the more confused I became. I couldn't understand why I wasn't perking up. After our last homeschool class, I vegged for an entire week. I didn't read anything, do anything, or go anywhere. I literally became a fixture in our home. My husband even began to worry about me, so much so, that he suggested I go to the doctor. But after that week, I began to feel a little lighter. Granted, i wasn't back to my old self yet, and as I posted previously, there is a changing season going on for me (and I don't like it, nope, not one bit). Said change is causing me to feel emotions I haven't felt in a while, and requiring much more sleep than I am accustom to. Truth be told, I'm nearly 40 and working my way through grad school - there isn't a nerve I've not frayed, nor a thought I haven't entertained about why in the devil I am doing all this.
Then it happened.
The last month has been a difficult one. Not because of any tragedy, nor was it because of any specific 'fault' or "person". It's just been difficult. After acknowledging this, I started wondering about how things used to be. When time was abundant. When worries were small. When I could put on a pair of heels, a little red lipstick, and take on the world.
But this past month, try as I might, I couldn't seem to find my "Get up and Go" that I was used to. No, I'm not ill. And I don't think the allergies made me lose that extra pep in my step. It could be age, but I'm still pretty young, seeing as how I've not reached the 40-year mark and I know 50-year-old's that are still going at top speed.
No, it was something else. It had to be. And that made me think more about who I had become. To do that, I had to remember who I used to be.
A season was changing for me and I was not ready!
Welcome! My name is LaVonda. I am the wife of Rodney, the mom of 5 remarkable kids (well, 2 are adults now), an avid homeschooler, blogger, and sociologist. I am blessed with the ability to spend my time sharing our homeschool and life experiences with you. It is my hope to provide you with motivation, ideas, and some candid stress-relief through my blog - Mom's Scribe! Grab a cup of coffee, sit on down, and make yourself at home!